For most of us, getting dressed for a date especially if it’s a first date, or even a second or a third date is pretty second nature. A clean shirt, a non-wrinkled dress, a nice pair of shoes all seem like obvious decisions, but do they really matter? As it turns out, what to wear on a first date actually matters a whole lot more than any of us probably want to admit. Meaning, will it really affect how your date views you if you’re dressed or not dressed a certain way? Are we over-thinking the whole thing? To get to the bottom of the dating-meets-fashion debate, here are some of the most frequent questions usually asked by ladies, as well as myself about what to wear during a date.
Does what you wear on a date really matter?
It does matter for sure. One of the things I did is interview men and women across the country, and I asked men: what are the things you first notice about women? One thing they brought up often is clothing; depending on the guy of course, he’s not going to notice labels or trends or anything like that but dressing yourself is a little bit like personal branding. It does say a lot about who you are. If he hasn’t talked to me yet, and is just looking at my photos on a dating profile, or from across the room, he uses clothing to determine if he might like me and if we might get along.
Does it go both ways? Or are just men eyeballing women’s fashion choices?
The “metrosexual” has died down a bit, but women do want men who have personal style. It doesn’t have to be a certain type of personal style, per se, but women do want someone who knows how to dress, who has some kind of aesthetic for himself that shows off what his personality is.
For people who don’t follow fashion closely, will their date’s clothing have an effect?
Another thing that I’ve learned in studying this and talking about this is that one of the ways to instantly make yourself more attractive and more presentable to other people is your clothing. It’s not so much what label or what trend, but that they fit well, and what state your clothes are in. People look more confident and more put together in clothes that fit them. That seems self-explanatory and obvious, but there are some people who just don’t put any thought into what they wear on first dates.
Why do you think the fit and appearance of clothing is so impactful?
These are the changeable parts of our appearance. I can’t easily change my body shape, but my clothing choice is something I can definitely alter. Personal style is branding: what I wear does determine the type of person that I’m going to attract.
What are some of the most common mistakes you’ve seen people make when choosing their dating attire?
Something that often comes up is high heels for women. Women either totally love heels or may never be seen without them, or they hate them and never wear them. But sometimes they’ll try to alter that to fit a guy’s height. Sometimes I wear flats on the first date because I’m worried about being taller than my date; but it’s really just about how awesome I feel. It’s not like he’s going to grow if I keep dating him, so I just wear my heels. If I do wear heels though, I make sure it’s not a super active date. I make sure I know what I’m doing ahead of time.
I hope these frequent questions helped you with your choice of clothing for your date. Don’t be afraid to explore different clothing’s. Be bold and fashionable!